A Lifetime of Laughter
Before we married, Quinn told me an anecdote from the old sitcom “Night Court.” The characters included the goofy judge, the “together” lawyer, and the grumpy-old-lady-guard. The “together” lawyer was lamenting the goofy judge’s capacity for silliness, how could they succeed in a forever relationship together when he refused to “grow up”? Concerns for his responsibility weighed upon her mind and the prospect of their future.
After a pause, the grumpy-old-lady-guard said, “Yeah… after a lifetime of laughter, what have you got?”
This story was one of the ways Quinn convinced me to keep him. So many worse fates than a lifetime of laughter.
Keeping a Sense of Humor
When my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s she said, “So…I’ve got old-timers?”
“Yup,” I said.
“Well, at least I’ve still got my sense of humor.”
The doctor said, “It’s better to lose your memory than your sense of humor.”
While my mother was sick and dying in the hospital, she joked with the nurses and hammed it up to the very last. At the visitation night before her funeral, there was more laughter than tears as friends and family shared stories and comforted one another. When family who couldn’t be here reached out to me, it was the memories full of laughter they shared with me.
Does Laughter Equal Happiness?
In a previous post about laughter, I mentioned the quote, “The problem with your family is they judge happiness by laughter.”
It’s true that laughter doesn’t simply equal true happiness. For example, a bitter cackle or a sinister snicker is empty of joy, yet still a laugh. But when there’s love…laughter and love are the quintessential complimentary team.
When times are good, the laughter flows easily like a rushing creek in the spring. When times are hard, laughter in a house with love is truly medicine, nourishment, and relief. I’ve been hungry but still happy, when I lived in a house with love and laughter.
I’ve also lived in a privileged space without want, but it included biting words, and missed thoughtfulness and respectfulness. I chose hungry (again) rather than live without the fullness that laughter and love together to bring.
Love that includes commitment, respect, encouragement – these are what make a nurturing home. Laughter is a delightful bonus. Laughter without the basis of love is…nice. But not enough. It can take the edge off of hard times, but not replace the comfort and stability that this combo brings.
My wish for everyone, really, is a home with the laughter that fills you, warms you, hugs you.
Marcus and Quinn crack me up nearly every day. We work at being fun and funny, it’s a priority in our home. To prove it, here’s a short video of these two goofballs, plus a surprise guest! (The laughing is the best part.)
This is a repost from a #LoveBlog2019 Challenge to the Finish The Sentence Friday. This weekend we were asked to write, “What I love about myself” Wellll, I love my house of love and laughter. I love that we joke together, through the good and the hard stuff.
(“It used to be an In-ee” – possibly the funniest thing I’ve heard in an unscripted video in a long time.)
You said “I’ve also lived in a privileged space without want, but it included biting words.” And don’t we, too often, endure the biting words because we thing the privilege brings us comfort, when actually those biting words cause more discomfort and harm? We are odd creatures, us humans. I’m glad you are in the company of those two goofballs who are clearly experts at the art of love and laughter…xoxox
Thanks Yes – Goofballs are the best! 🙂
I chose hungry (again) rather than live without the fullness that laughter and love together to bring.
Even the Bible does say that it’s better to be in a place of want and be happy than to be in a wealthy place with bitterness. (Paraphrased).
I did not know that (about the Bible teaching) but I believe it. 🙂
I have a lot of problems with how I grew up etc but one I can never truly fault is how much fun we used to have, mostly making fun of my father for having a really bad sense of humour. Now with my partner I just laugh for absolutely no reason at all, and I think the ability to be silly without feeling judged or inappropriate is what makes a home to me.
Laughter based in love is the best! <3
Hi Mardra, I completely relate to the importance of laughter with those we love. I try to bring in humor everyday to show my kids that it helps us all feel better. Having a special needs child has made me even more mindful to bring out my silly side.
Sometimes part of “the gift” is reprioritizing what really is important.
I adore their video and May blocking the camera 😉 and agree completely that love laughter at home is more fulfilling than anything. <3