Dear 2015, I want it all

I’ve been freaking out in my goal setting or resolutions or targets or systems or whatever you want to call the way the brain prepares for a New Year while coming to terms with the idea that another year has slipped away.

Four years ago I left my job as company president and struck out to be a writer. Oh My, if I knew then what I know now, I never *never* would have left. THANK GOD I DIDN’T KNOW. That said, another year of learning and another year of planning and writing and re-writing has passed and, well, there’s that need to keep a roof over our head and bread in the cupboard…

In October this Tweet came across my line of vision:


I saved it and have fretted over it. I’ve been told over the years that perhaps part of the reason I feel like an also-ran instead of a winner is because I set impossible goals. I don’t believe that however, because the fact is the goals I set are all possible. It’s just somewhere along the line I haven’t done what it takes to reach them; I’ve made compromises. You know, like sleep or family or the like.

The greatest of the greats in any calling make sacrifices.

I know this from experience, too. For years I drank work-a-hol straight from the bottle. I was very good at business and what I did for my business. I wasn’t so great at being a mother however and I wasn’t writing much or learning anything except what I needed to know for that business. I also wondered why I was always tired and sick. My doctor didn’t wonder. She told me it was the work-o-hol, but I didn’t believe it. Where was I? Oh, so anyway my point is Gladwell’s 10,000 hours is no myth. You have to put in the time and the learning and the dedication to get anywhere.

SO, back to the tweet – I’ve been fretting, what is the “anything” that I want to accomplish in 2015? That ONE ANYTHING among the list, long, long, list of “anythings” for me, for Marcus, for the organizations I volunteer for, for my current job and its new ventures, for The Road, for advocacy, for The Innocent Prince, for building a platform, for my health, for this blog and website, is that it? Well, it’s enough for you to get the idea.

Yeah, I said that.

Yeah, I said that.

Just today I decided,

Fuck it, I’m still going to try to do it all anyway. Yes. I said that. I don’t want to pick. You can’t make me. At this time next year, maybe I’ll lament my inability to cut and choose, but for now, I’m going to keep swinging at every one of these anythings. And I’m going to continue to be frustrated that I’m not “closer” to getting them all done, but I’m going to keep inching. So to 2015, please know that I can do what I can do and I will continue to try to do more than I can do (you got that?:) ) and please be patient as I try to do everything instead of anything.

And also, 2015, watch out, ‘cause we are coming in swinging!

 

If you’d like to get email updates not too often, Join The Club here.

 

2015-01-03T10:48:35+00:00Categories: Grown Ups & Downs|Tags: , |4 Comments

4 Comments

  1. Kerri December 31, 2014 at 7:34 am - Reply

    I love it, that you own wanting to do it all and damn those who say you cannot. Happy New Year!!!

    • Mardra December 31, 2014 at 10:04 am - Reply

      Thanks Kerri!
      Best wishes to you and your family XXOO – Ms

  2. Jenny January 1, 2015 at 11:24 am - Reply

    This post made me smile…I say go for it, ALL of it!! Happy New Year!

  3. Quinn Sikora January 3, 2015 at 5:56 pm - Reply

    I’m guilty of this, too. I want to be a comedian, voice artist, sound engineer, drummer, guitarist, keyboardist, bass player, songwriter, composer, and webpreneur.

    I have paired back my ambitions.

    Now, I just want to write and record funny songs with goofy voices and sell them online.

    Shit.

Leave A Comment